Hello all. Today, we have a brilliantbrown exclusive… an interview with acclaimed author Tariq Nasheed! Many of our loyal readers may have seen his name mentioned sporadically throughout a number of posts on this site, but may not be familiar with his work. As the author of 3 best-selling relationship books; The Art of Mackin, Play or Be Played, and The Mack Within, Nasheed has made a name for himself with witty, funny, and insightful commentary on dating and relationships.
Not only does Nasheed have a 4th book on the way, The Art of Goldigging, but you can also hear him on his Mack Lessons Radio Show, which can be found at www.macklessonsradio.com or by browsing your iTunes podcast directory for “mack lessons“. Tariq Nasheed currently resides in Los Angeles, CA and has appeared on a number of television shows such as MTV’s “Made” and The Conan O’Brien Show.
On your show, you have touched on the subject of the degradation of hip-hop music, do you think a resurgence can happen? If so, what current artists can help lead us in the right direction (Outkast, Common, Nas, etc.)?
There has to be BALANCE… There is nothing wrong with novelty type of rap songs (like Walk It Out, Laffy Taffy, Lean Wit It, etc), but when that’s all that on the market, it messes the game up. Back in hip hop’s golden era, there were novelty records (like The Rappin Duke, and Biz Markie’s Just A Friend, etc) but you also had artist like Rakim, Slick Rick, KRS One, Public Enemy, etc to balance everything out.
You credit yourself as being a former game-adviser, in the media though, some have categorized you as a former pimp, can you clarify or distinguish between the two professions for your fans? And as a follow up to that, were you ever in the pimp game?
No, I was not in the pimp game… When I first came out with my books, no one was doing what I was doing. It was something brand new… And the media likes to be able to categorize certain things. So some people wanted to put my books in the “pimp” category. Sometimes people come up to me and say “you were the guy on MTV teaching that white kid how to be a pimp”. And that totally false. None of my books are about pimping… And I didn’t teach the kid on MTV Made how to be a pimp… The kid was a total nerd… Who was he going to pimp on? I teach guys how to have confidence and how to generally improve their game.
You have mentioned the influences of your mother and grandmother on your radio show previously, who were your biggest influences in the game and how to properly deal with women? Also, what was the best piece of advice that you recieved from another player as far as dealing with women?
Well my grandmother was a very classy lady (and my mother was too). But my grandmother really set the bar high for how I judge women. And the first lesson I learned from my player friends, is do NOT treat women as if they are superior to you.
Not sure if you have covered this topic before, but considering the divide between today’s black men and black women as far as dating and relationships go, how do you think the two parties can come together effectively and maintain healthy, long-standing relationships?
I place the responsibility on black men… because women will only do what men allow them to do. And too many black men are allowing black women to disrespect them. When black men start raising their standards and start letting black women know that no form of disrespect will be tolerated, the game will start to change for the better.
You know we couldn’t let you go without asking one of these type questions, but, since you’ve raved about the quality of Brazilian women esp. after your recent trip, if you had to choose one, would it be a Brazilian dime or Black American dime and why?
I would chose a Brazilian female, hands down. Brazilian women have been taught to respect and cater to the men they deal with. Plus, Brazilian women are fine as hell. Plus they have a lot of sex appeal.
You can purchase all of Tariq’s book at www.amazon.com (all 3 get the brilliantbrown thumbs up, damn good reads) and you can check out his official site at www.macklessons.com where you can purchase the hilarious Mack Lessons DVD.
Congratulations on the interview fellas. It seems Mr. Nasheed has some interesting viewpoints. The ability to take risks, deal with failure, and to be confident should be a general philosphy to Life. It would be interesting to see what others say about the brotha.
As for the Brazilian/Black American woman thing, I think a lot of the attraction there is the confidence building the women do there. Plus, your money goes a little further (which is really what most of the women are attracted to) spend a little money and they’ll say whatever they need to.
The thing that appeals to me about Tariq is that he talks about the things all guys talk and think about in dating and relationships and he tells the story from a male perspective, which is usually not that evident, because most of time, most guys will take a backseat to females in relationships as to not piss them off so that they can continue to get ass on a regular basis. Also, as Tariq has stated before, the majority of relationship articles, shows,music etc., are geared towards the female consensus and is not really a true representation of how a real thorough guy feels about anything. The culture that is created by that basically allows for relationships to be driven by a man catering to a female’s emotions, where all his actions are basically REactions to whatever the female is feeling, rather than compromise between the two parties.
You do bring up an interesting point about the Brazilian/Black dime issue though chuck, I do think black women are not taught to build confidence in their men, they are too afraid to appear weak and submissive to others. I know plenty of black women that would be cool to date if they weren’t so argumentative and sassy.
AJ,
Good points. Perhaps we’ll see some other folks step into the conversation…C’mon people!
As always, there will be work to do on each side. As often as I am accused of being too much of an optimist, I am really more pragmatic about the future of black relationships. I don’t think there will ever be a day where there will be stronger black families on a whole. People are too afraid to take risks. I talk with people all the time who are “throwing off the shackles of tradition” as if all tradition is bad. Thus, I talked to people everyday who’d rather just live together and not get legally married (makes it easier to get out of the relationship if things get tough).
People are more interested in making joint-ventures and not mergers (to use business-speak). So instead of handling “our” problems, “our” money, etc, its more about “My” Money, “My” life, “Your” problem, etc.
Of course, I only speak of sharing inside a marriage, and not necessarily a relationship. Ground rules should be set from the get-go, and not in the sack.
I’ve been in a pretty long-term relationship and I’ve learned quite a bit this time around. You’ve been around me long enough AJ when I was in my younger days and thought it was great when a girl actually showed interest and I wore my feelings a bit too much on my shoulder. I’ve found that a little bit of sarcasm/pragmatism/downright honesty does eliminate quite a few problems and does a good job of cutting through mess.
But sex is a powerful thing, and for those guys whose only conquest is sexual towards women it can get pretty messy trying to communicate that across, but I think long-term, the safest way to get what you want is to be direct about it and not try to “trick” women into thinking you want more into just trying to bone. In turn I think women should just be more honest about what they want and not be afraid to hurt a guy’s feelings and let them be men and experience failure so that they step their Game up.
Perhaps you have a different point of view?
P.S.>>How’s your Brackets doin’?
where’s the podcast? is the interview on the internet? i wanna listen to it!!! i’ll come back later and add another comment later….it’s way too late and i’m delirious..
Taneika,
We actually interviewed him through email questions, we haven’t set up the podcast yet, but be on the look out, it’s coming.
Aw shucks, not the “mack” Tariq Nasheed. He is definitely not the type of man whose comments would affect me in any way. He is a womanizer, and he can womanize all of the Brazilian women he wants. Maybe he hasn’t been the man that a black woman would want to submit to.
why do you classify him as a “womanizer”, Stef?
From what I’ve seen of him, he seems to be on this mack kick. Like, he has to surround himself with women at all times, and get them before they get him, which I think is ridiculous. Not all women are out to play a man or get over on him, so to take that stance with all women is unfair. I did see him on that Made episode and I felt that he was overconfident and was trying to get this goofy dude to be a playa. The focus should have been on him finding ONE special girl who was interesting in him, not trying to pick up whoever. I don’t know, Tariq Nasheed just rubs me the wrong way.
I think he rubs you the wrong way because you attach a negative connotation with the term “mack”, that’s ok. most women do, if you actually read his books, his definition of a mack is a lot deeper than it appears on the surface, as of matter of fact, i’ll post a podcast up here for you to listen to, but you have to listen to it objectively then make a judgement call, by no means am I a Tariq Nasheed-apologist, but any guy that has really listened to the type of message that he spits and says they came away with no constructive knowledge is bullshitting, that’s just real talk.
well, the one time i have listened to tariq nasheed, he didn’t impress me too much. usually it’s the women that are cynical about relationships, but he seems to be that way himself. someone give me an update on his relationship status….i could be wrong, and i’ll even try to make myself listen to another one of his podcasts….but i don’t think i am. we will see…..
Ok, ok, I will post a podcast or two here and I want you ladies to listen to it and then make an assessment, be on the look out, I’ll post them later.
I can speak to the Brazilian women thing. I have a guy friend who vacationed in Brazil and when he told me about his experience there, he said that the women over there treat black men as if they were the most valuable thing in the world. The men get a lot of attention, and of course their egos are stroked…yada yada yada…now that’s not necessarily a bad thing because if I were in a relationship, I would be with someone that I treasured in the same way.
What these women fail to realize is their own self worth. Some women still believe in being subservient to men- not submissive- but I’m talking about feeling as if they are below men on the food chain- NOT!! In some cultures, we all know that still happens. In America, however, we’ve evolved past that notion. All men are not worthy to be treated as kings and many will take advantage of women who are so giving. All women don’t deserve to be treated like queens because all women don’t carry themselves as such.
I believe Tariq Nosebleed is so enthralled with Brazilian women because he 1) has not found a good black woman by whom he doesn’t feel threatened, or 2) he likes being able to control some variable of relationships. Personally, I refuse to take “mack lessons” from someone who’s not in a successful situation themselves. You all pretty much know how I roll…..
how do you define “successful” in a relationship? Just ’cause you have a significant other doesn’t make you successful, just like having an expensive car doesn’t make you rich. I’m pretty sure you or anyone can say that they have been in successful relationships in which they have learned from, but they didn’t work out for whatever reason. I would much rather get advice from someone that has been through various situations and scenarios with different types of people than someone who has been with the same person for years on end, their perspective is jaded and not objective, that’s just my opinion though,like I said, I will post a podcast or 2, listen to them, then pass judgement on the brotha, don’t just down him just because he speaks his mind and it doesn’t cater to trhe black female dominating aura.
Keep in mind that Tariq is not trying to make anybody subservient to no one. His whole game is about us men especially Black men raise our standards and leadership styles to an all time high because most of the men in this society has dumbed down, chilled out, and feminized as well as become passive agressive.
If you don’t believe me than why is that whenever a man wants to start a corporation and/or his own business there’s always some wimpish man or woman are always making suggestions like “Wendy’s is hiring”, “Hewlett Packard is hiring…”, and so on. Beneath those messages are people happy to be on the plantation and don’t want to rock the boat.
Therefore, there will always be people that will attack people like Tariq because he wants us to raise our standards. He’s a threat and being a metrosexual is not.
Tariq shares the tactics to help find that One for you. I view his theories like applying for a job. You can’t expect to get an interview with everyone you submit your resume to. You know you need one so you keep submitting till one gives you a chance. the usage of the word “mack” is how he labels confidence. That’s what it takes to get where and what you want. Good post man.
Blah blah. This interview seems very one sided. Why is Tariq constantly pointing the finger at black women? Even when he starts off by saying, he blames black men, he then goes into saying that black men need to let black women know they will not tolerate disrespect. How about black men are the main ones who need to stop the disrespecting! I do not go around disrespecting men, that doesn’t even seem logical to me. I want to be treated with respect so I treat others with respect but I have had black men try to disrespect me and I am not with that at all. What exactly does he mean by that because I don’t nor do any of my friends disrespect men so I’m not sure what type of women he has encountered.
i’ll post the podcast where he talks about disrespect tomorrow night stef, but pretty much he acknowledges that not all black women are disrespectful, but the as a collective, he feels that the ones that are spoil it for the good ones, such as yourself and friends, alledgedly.
“Women Who Claim They Are Always Busy”
Copy/paste into browser: http://www.zshare.net/audio/macklessons86-mp3.html
I’ll post another later.
man there were too many side convos goin on and too many stupid questions being asked….i couldn’t listen to much I think I have ADD…LOL…based on what I did hear, he seems like he’s really bitter twds the black woman- and it seems like he wants to get back at black women for whatever those experiences may have been. just my assessment….people always say that you shouldn’t hold others accountable for the mistakes that past romances held….and he’s holding fast to those things….i don’t like the fact that he feels women should be TAUGHT to cater to their men….out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks…and i’m glad this post is here so that we can see what some men really think…..i think he’s a fool but we all are afforded the freedom of speech. all of us have someone that we admire or respect, but he just talks to hear himself talk…. ok i’m done for now…be back after someone responds to this LOL
all i got to say is you women that have a problem with tariq nasheed really dont know him. listen to the podcast then judge.
After giving Tariq a fair listen (until this morning I had never even listened to the brotha before). Within the first 5-10 minutes I think he was speaking truth about the standards of men that women choose. I think he responded fairly to the woman who was impregnated by MySpace Loser Guy and how to handle compliments from women.
As for the “busy/working women” segment, I think it’s an interesting point when he mentioned that most women under 27 (what an arbitrary number!) who say that they are busy or involved in a relationship. Perhaps, but I don’t know. Many times I think they’re afraid to get involved in a relationship. However, if there are women who are actually like that, I think it goes back to some honesty!!! Simply come clean so that dudes can move on.
Fellas, if you want to just “hook up,” then like dude said, just say it! If she turns you down, move on. The problems arise when men and women become embittered because one party (or both) keep their ultimate motives hidden.
Personally I don’t think “hook-up” relationships are meant to last, but do what you do—if you ultimately just want some sex and no much else (just being honest), society pretty much allows it these days. It’s better to be outright about it and save yourself a lot of time and confusion.
It’s so funny though that at the end, the brotha is a businessman!
Thanks for everyone’s input, this is what I’m talking about, people coming together and chopping it up, whether you agree or disagree, of course TRJ is stirring it up as usual, but I’m glad some dudes came on here with some balls in support of the brother Nasheed giving us guys good game. As far as the 27 age thing charles, I’ll send you the podcast link where he delves into why 27 is the cutoff age for females and they way they deal with relationships, I’ll post another on here specifically for the women to check out later.
Thanks everyone, we have more interviews lined up with some more black celebs so we keepin it moving and shaking here at the brown, keep checking us out and tell your friends!
Great conversation everyone, as always TRJ is here to stir things up, bu I’m glad some dudes got on here and gave their 2 cents too. I’ll post another he did strictly for women a bit later.
I went to the library after work today and checked out his book “Play or be Played” so I will actually read one of his books. I probably won’t start it until this weekend because I have some professional reading I need to do this week. But once I read it, I will share my comments.
Okay, I listened to the posted zShare. That was really a mess and for men who think what he said is cool, you all are proving many women correct in their beliefs about men, specifically black men. For one thing, he needs to learn to speak correctly. Textes (Pronounced as textez), being said for texts? Oh goodness, and the Luke mix in the background? Puhleeze. Basically he was talking about “hittin” females and not wasting time on a female if she isn’t trying to give it up. He doesn’t have time to sit around and chit chat or text message according to him. Um, I don’t know what planet he thinks he’s on, but all women aren’t going to drop their panties at the drop of a hat. Also addressing women as broads and bitches also got under my skin. The comment he made about the myspace babydaddy thing was one thing that I agreed with. The female should look at herself since she allowed herself to get pregnant by such a deadbeat. But as far as the relationship advice, I think he is off. Let a brother step to me like him and he will get his feelings hurt.
maybe men and women will never agree on this guy, so be it, but i listen to all his podcasts and have read his books, i think he has alot of good stuff to say, you’re being a lil’ nitpicky when referring to him enunciating certain words, but he speaks from a perspective that black women should pay attention to, because alot of black men feel this way, but are afraid to say anything to directly
Well maybe I’ll stop dating black men. I was being nitpicky because he p’d me off. If all you want is a bootycall, then go find a ho. If I know that all a man is interested is that and that he really doesn’t want to converse with me or spend quality time with me, then he can go kick rocks with no shoes on. I am not a freaking call girl and will not be treated as such. Tariq’s comments showed that he see’s women as sex objects. He kept referring to them giving it up and how men shouldn’t waste their time, etc… If most black men think that way then those of you can take a hike.
hey stef y dont u call the mack lessons radio show and speak your mind about it.because i wanna hear him put u in check cuz u dont know what u are talking about.
I also have a male-empowerment podcast like Tariq. I am the Joseph South he gave the shout out to in today’s Episode # 87 on how the game has changed.
First off, let me make it absolutely clear that I adore women. I just love them! That doesn’t mean I will turn a blind eye to the games women play, or that I will hold back from teaching men what they need to know in order to not be taken for a ride. When you consider some simple facts, like 84% of the $40 billion in child support every year goes from the bank accounts of men into the accounts of women, merely because women are believed to be better parents and better people, then you can’t say men don’t need any help in our society.
What Stef and other women don’t like about Tariq and guys like me also have a male-empowerment podcast) is that we are pointing out to men everywhere that women have great game and men are usually severely lacking in that department. It is not uncommon for a beautiful young woman to have 7 or 8 men chasing her and blowing up her phone. Men deserve to have the skills that allow them to have the same choice.
Stef says that women aren’t going to “just drop their panties”, well, some women actually love sex, in fact they like it as much or more than men do, and they will indeed drop their panties quickly for the right man at the right time.
Another thing that women criticizing Tariq’s Brazil vs. US comparison fail to understand is that men THRIVE on appreciation and respect. This has always been the way through human history. I am all for the empowerment of women but in our society this has gone too far. Young women are taught that men will pay for them simply because they are female; that it’s ok to show up 1 hour late for a date; that it’s ok to not return phone calls; that it’s ok to date multiple men but out of the other side of your mouth criticize the men who want to have choice when it comes to women.
Wise men will no longer tolerate the double standard, and the good news is they have plenty of women to choose from now, who understand that to keep a good man you have to get over your Magic Pussy Syndrome (google it!), keep the man’s balls drained, and treat him with proper respect.
Cheers,
Joseph W. South
I appreciate your comment Joseph, lamont I’m not even going to go there. But regarding Joseph’s comment, I didn’t say that no women would just drop their panties. I said not all of them will. There are always those women out there who engage in casual sex. I for one, am not one of those women. Now, as far as dropping their panties for the right man, there is nothing at all wrong with that. But, on that interview Tariq stated that if the woman isn’t trying to let him hit, he won’t waste his time. I have a major problem with that. I don’t play games with men nor do I try to juggle multiple men. Personally, I just don’t have that kind of time. Also, I’m not comfortable being pulled in different directions. When I meet someone that I’m truly interested in, that’s it. I don’t try to have other men waiting in the wings, I let them know the deal up front and usually they stop calling. I can’t stand for people to be inconsistent or inconsiderate so I try to refrain from acting as such. If I say I’m going to call, I do, if I say I’ll meet you at 6:00, I will unless something major comes up and I will let them know if that is the case. That’s just how I do things so I take offense when men try to generalize and cluster all women/black women together.
‘Preciate the comments lamont and Joe South, Stef you should read the book when you get time, it will educate you and open your mind, just because a dude doesn’t cater to you doesn’t mean that he doesn’t respect you. Tariq talks about options for banging women because that is what guys ASK, he answers the questions alot of guys in the dating game, black, white, whatever have, how to get close the deal with women and not end up being in the friend zone or as a back-up dude, etc.
I don’t recall ever saying that a dude needs to cater to me. I just ask for what I give, and that’s the bottom line.
Well..Now this conversation is getting a little heat!
To Stef - I think that the approach and dislike you have about the situation that frustrates you can actually be a benefit. I’m refering to:
and
Both of these points you brought up can be helpful. Think about it–if this is the approach that some black men are about, and you aren’t about that–then it’s good that you never get involved in the first place. It’s good that you would have no business to do with said person. Saves a lot of drama/confusion in the long run.
The key word is integrity. The dude lets you know upfront. You tell him you’re not about that. End of conversation. Both of you save face. The problem arises when the man or woman tries to hide their motives essentially using the person as a sexual holdover until something better comes along. Don’t dabble in that if that’s not what you’re about. Law of supply and demand will eventually work in your favor: if you don’t tolerate being simply pursued sexually, you will find a guy who matches you. And that’s a great thing.
Good points chuck.
I just happen to be talking to TRJ now and I just read to her what Charles said. She stated telling someone something upfront does not necessarily make you an upstanding person. Does someone telling you that they’re going to break in your house right before they do it make them have better character? Come on now… Being a selfish butthole who is only interested in sex and the fact of him being upfront about it does not give him cool points.
See, many women will use phrases like this: “Being a selfish butthole who is only interested in sex”… the fact is, ALL healthy people are interested in sex, both men AND women…. There are some biological reasons why women need to be more selective when it comes to choosing partners, but they don’t want sex any less.
When a woman makes a comment like this before you have even slept together, you can be sure that once you are in a relationship with her and you crave to get with her, you will in time become the “pig who is only interested in one thing, etc.”
Men, pay very, very close attention to the words a woman uses right at the outset. That is what me and several colleagues like to call her Early Frame Announcement (EFA). It is a strong indication of how the woman feels about relationships and about men in general.
If a woman really believes the nonsense that men like sex more than women, or that men want sex and women want “so much more”, or that men are incapable of emotions and women are incapable of casual sex, then you have a female chauvinist on your hands. Tariq, I, and others are here to help you to see the situation for what it is.
Last point, never apologize for your sexual desires as a man. You are a man with balls and your feelings and desires are legitimate. Never allow yourself to be shamed by a woman for being a real man, and as you can see, some women will try to do just that.
Cheers,
Joseph W. South
Hi again Stef..
Let’s start with:
That’s beside the point–after all, if someone told me they were about to break into my house, I probably couldn’t tell them “Sorry, not interested…” and they simply walk away. I would have to defend my property. If I guy tells you he wants to hit and that’s all, you can say “Thanks, but no thanks.” Generally, that’s not someone you should consider having a long-term relationship with–if any relationship at all!
All I’m saying is that it’s doing you a favor–that’s one guy to cross off your “Is he a good guy?” List. End of story. If enough women do that, guys who do that will eventually move on to the next girl, saving you a headache. What’s the problem with that?
I’m not going back and forth with you anymore. I am a woman, you all are men so we are not going to see eye to eye on everything. I never said men aren’t capable of having emotions, etc… I was speaking on what TARIQ said during that particular broadcast and stating my opinions on men who feel the same way. So, anyhoo carry on with your friends,colleagues, and whoever else.
Man, if it weren’t for TRJ and stef….ya’ll jokaz wouldn’t have had as many comments as you do now…..there’s no point in going back and forth….you say we’re not being open minded, but it’s a 2 way street….so you men continue your “manly” discussions and see how far you get. End of discussion. Great thanks…….BISH!!!!!!
we appreciate your comments but don’t think you’re that serious, we post this for everyone, if you choose to come on here and comment and engage in back and forth discussion so be it, but your comments are what they are, we don’t get any money for them so if you don’t leave them, you’re just choosing to leave your own opinion unnoticed. Charles, Joe South, don’t let anyone here discourage you from speaking your mind, other people are reading and soaking in game.
AJ
“Being a selfish butthole who is only interested in sex and the fact of him being upfront about it does not give him cool points.”
Sex isn’t something men just benefit from. If anybody gets more out of sex, its women. Not only do you have more intense (multiple) orgasms, but that seed your getting can be a meal ticket for the rest of your life.
I think being upfront about it DOES give him cool points. Whats wrong with being interested in just sex? Stef, you aren’t, so the two of you aren’t compatible. But if all someone wants is sex, should they not be upfront about it? You act like sex is a bad thing.
I think you took his podcast too personal.
Seed being a meal ticket? LMAO!!!!!!!!! Sweetheart, that is a joke. Only in instances where the man is very well off, (ex. P-Diddy and Kim Coles) is having a child like a meal ticket. Many men don’t even pay child support hence the need for child support enforcement or only pay menial amounts so that is in no way a meal ticket. Children cost money so it is the man’s responsibily as well as the woman’s to take care of the childs needs, meal ticket ha that was a good laugh for the day, thanks.
And being up front is good, I appreciate honesty but men who are just interested in sex need to stay as far from me as possible. That is just something that I’m not interested in so them telling me that up front won’t help them because they will still lose out. I don’t know about other women, but you have to put in some work with me.
Well this is my first time on this site, but I wanted to add my opinion on the ‘Mack’. I haven’t heard any of his lessons lately, but the ones that I have heard they were interesting. My thing is this I enjoy listening to him for the most part because I find it interesting listening to males perspective about females and other affiliated topics. The words aren’t always pleasent but it show the level of respect that some men possess for women. I must say that I if you listen to his words and sit back and analyze yourself if you possess some of the qualities that he speak about then you might wanna think about changing up your swagger (for the better) that is if you feel that he makes all women seem like hoes, traps, and etc,. but for the most part I see it as verbal male perspective entertainment! At the end of the lesson it’s only an opinion!!!!!!!!
Steph,
“And being up front is good, I appreciate honesty but men who are just interested in sex need to stay as far from me as possible.”
Why not be honest and up front in return and say that you are not interested?
“That is just something that I’m not interested in so them telling me that up front won’t help them because they will still lose out.”
Are they not saving time that they could spend with someone who is honestly interested?
“I don’t know about other women, but you have to put in some work with me.”
Is honest sex not of mutual benefit and pleasure? Why the work?
Joseph W. South,
The Magic Pussy Syndrome is very interesting. Thanks.
Have you read Mode One: Let The Women Know What You’re REALLY Thinking by Alan Roger Currie? This book includes a discussion about how being honest and up front with women has the potential to expose manipulative women for who they really are and for what they really want.
Mack
Mack, I haven’t seen that book yet but I will check it out, thanks very much!
Yes, I agree that being upfront with women is a good idea. Of course, we still want to keep our Charm, Tact and Discretion. But it’s a huge mistake for a MAN to act like he doesn’t LIKE sex because he’s afraid of offending a delicate women who thinks sex is bad and that men should “work” (aka beg) her for it. Real women appreciate real men and won’t put a man down simply because he owns a set of balls and likes to have sex with an attractive woman (or several).
What I believe Tariq is saying is that if a woman wants to play games like she is more valuable than you, that you need to supplicate to her, and that wanting sex is somehow bad or dirty, then get rid of her immediately. She will be trouble for as long as you choose to deal with her.
I feel sorry for guys who marry women who tell them - RIGHT UP FRONT! - that ‘men who want sex are selfish pigs’. That should be a HUGE red flag - the woman’s Early Frame Announcement (EFA) should be telling you that this woman has a bad case of the Magic Pussy Syndrome.
A man shouldn’t have to beg for sex. Personally, I think begging is a turn off. And what I meant by work for it, was not what it was twisted into. A man just being there is not going to warrant me wanted to have sex with him. For ME, as I stated ME, this is all my personal outlook, I can’t speak for other women… A man has to show that he is interested in me and I have to be interested in him. We need to have emotional, intellectual, and physical similarities. Also we would have to spend time together, go on dates (not chilling at home watching tv 24-7), and enjoy each others company. All of those things combined contribute to my interest in a man sexually. That interest does not happen automatically, for ME.
While I don’t agree with the “Unchecked Casual Sex” concept mentioned by Brother South above (mostly on religious grounds), he has the right to his opinion. Some people are like that. You may not agree with his philosophy, but Stef, I think you and he are talking past each other.
In a sense, you are agreeing that if all a dude is interested in is your body, then it’s not for you. You’ve made that known. I think you may be a bit shocked at his bluntness about the matter, but I think we’ve established that you would not be compatible with his type, and I think he agrees.
Charles, you are right. I am not going to continue going back and forth like I stated earlier. I just wanted to explain what I meant because I don’t think feeling that way makes me manipulative. There are some men, (they may be few in number) who also need deeper connections in place before they become sexual with a woman. Casual sex is not only meaningless but also dangerous.
Oh and I meant Kim Porter in my earlier comment, not Kim Coles(Living Single), oops
It’s not about casual sex, although I agree that one should not be making judgments against consenting adults. It’s the view that because one is female, one is morally superior to men. Male sex drive was referred to in a very derogatory way. It is no worse than calling a woman a slut or a whore because she chooses to be single or chooses to date more than one person at a time. Many women DO choose that lifestyle. If one of us men had started with that kind of anti-female language how long would it take before men and women called the man on it?
We are so conditioned to believe that women hold the high ground when it comes to morality, that men must pay for the company of women if they are to be considered “gentlemen”, that women are better parents, that “men are pigs”, that a man needs to “try hard” or “work hard” to be with a woman ONLY BECAUSE SHE IS FEMALE… Men are afraid to call women on blatant misandry, but I am not and neither are a growing number of men.
I am all for women AND men having high standards and for being sure a person is right for you before jumping in the sack… but the idea that male sex drive is something vastly different than a female’s, or that a man should apologize for being honest and open about his desires as a man, that very mindset should be offensive on it’s face to anyone who believes in equal rights.
Cheers,
Joseph
You all need to have “5 Questions with ‘Mode One’ Author Alan Roger Currie”!!
Alan
Author, “Mode One: Let The Women Know What You’re REALLY Thinking”
http://www.modeone.net
Radio Interview: http://modeone.net/archives/Walt_Baby_Love.mp3
Video Interview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKBlh4GzI4U
This was GREAT stuff guys… I soaked in EVERY BIT of good game that was shared… Good stuff…
It seems as though some are caught up in their ways, but it isn’t anything one should dwell on… Chivalry is being modified to accommodate BOTH parties as opposed to one and I guess that some aren’t too fond of it…
I dig what Tariq preaches (I’ve heard every podcast)… Do I agree with everything he says? No… but for the most part, it’s understandable…
Tariq Nasheed is re-introducing the game to a lost generation of brothas who grew up with the notion that women are superior than they are; that women should be put on a pedestal with men chiming in to their every whelm…
LOL… Please
The ‘mack’ ideology is back in effect re-masculating(YES… I know it’s not a word) men…
What up yal I just read Tariq’s book “The Mack Within”. Overall its a pretty good book. It has a lot of good points that a man can use and learn from. My only question is what is up with him and black women. I mean there are times when he is describing women, but its like when he talks about the bad ones, you know the ones to avoid, its like he is only refering to black women. You have to keep in mind that he is black, and that for the most part his audience is also black, but I just think that at times he is saying too much negative things about black women, and not enough about the other races. Eventhough he has an over emphasis of generalizations, I still think that this is a great book. Im just wondering if he dates black women or not. Let me know what yal think
Is it really that serious?
Josh,
As far as I know, he dates black women, as a matter of fact, in many of his podcasts, he says that he prefers black women, as far as him speaking detrimentally towards black women, I think it’s a case where its easiest to relate to and notice the flaws of what you are most familiar with, hence many of his comments directed towards balck women. He did do a podcast that talked about how to mack to white women, asian women, etc., its on macklessonradio.com, but if i can dig them up, i’ll post the links here.
Dustin,
I’m not sure I understand your quasi-question, is what that serious?
AJ
I think Tariq has some very interesting stuff to say when it comes to relations between the sexes among black people. As a white man I found it very interesting and it’s something I have to admit I had been pretty ignorant about. Tariq said that in the days of slavery, there had been a systematic effort to humiliate the men in front of the women.
It’s true that if a woman sees men being disrespected then they learn over time that it’s ok to disrespect men. You are seeing this in the white community as well… just look at shows like Everybody Loves Raymond, or even commercials for automobiles. The man is portrayed as a fool, aka “lovable loser”, who needs his woman to rescue him, or roll her eyes at him. The guy is “lucky” to have such a “beautiful” woman because he has been taught that he “must work for her” and other misandric bullshit.
As a result of men being systematically disrespected and hence becoming literally AFRAID of women, men have retreated into a shell of erroneous beliefs about the true nature of men and women. Today you often hear women saying “where have all the real men gone?” These attitudes have hurt both men AND women and are the direct result of a lot of feminist ideas perpetrated in the past 40-50 years in western society.
Cheers,
Joseph
Well said Mr. South
AJ
Tariq is consistently giving facts as to what to look out for in the dating world. He also gives good sound advice for women. you just have to be open to his suggestions.